Because obviously 140 characters ain't enough for a rant so here we go, yet again *inhales deeply
For years I never really thought much about this term "friendzoned". We throw it around and make jokes about it, and I never really gave much thought about it until I saw this pic that was quite popular on 9gag:
This is the moment when it hit me.
Are you implying that by being nice to a girl, you are entitled to a relationship or sex? And when that doesn't happen, its friendzoned???
WHAT ON MOTHER EARTH.
First off, you should be nice to a girl because its the RIGHT THING TO DO. It's basic etiquette. And I'm not just talking about girls, but everyone in general. Shouldn't you treat people nicely just because, well, its right? DON'T TREAT A GIRL NICE JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE ULTERIOR MOTIVES LIKE GETTING INTO HER PANTS OR ANYTHING ELSE FOR THAT MATTER. Similarly, don't just be nice to people just because you're looking to get rewarded. Thats just not how its works.
Just because you treat a girl nice, doesn't mean she owes you anything and you are not entitled to anything either (misogynistic much) You think developing feelings for someone very easy is it. No. Its much much more complicated than that. Who knows what it takes? Chemistry? Butterflies? Better connection? Do you think feelings are like a switch you can flip on and off? Why do guys think that it is absolutely necessary for girls to like them by just being nice, when being nice is a normality and it is generally a courteous thing to do?
No matter how nice you treat a girl to win her heart, you are also forgetting that girls have a choice as human beings. Just because you're nice to girl, doesn't mean she has to choose you. She has every right to make choices and even if that choice doesn't involve being with you or even if it's a worse-off choice, it is her choice and it does not mean that she's wrong or she's a bitch. It may be unfortunate for you, yes, but it is not her fault.
Also.. Is the "friendzone" really such a bad place to be at? Can't two different genders just be friends without any need for sexual attraction or whatever it is? Why must some guys prioritize getting a girl than just being friends first?
Whatever it is, when I saw that pic on 9gag I instantly imagine a guy sitting behind his computer, carefully plotting his intricately drawn pie chart of "why I'm single" because all his Nice Guy attempts have not resulted in a GIRLFRIEND. SOUND SO BITTER AND SAD CAN. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS NOT BEING ABLE TO HAVE A GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE YOU'RE NICE. What fucking sad logic is that? How on earth did you manage to come up with that conclusion? I dunno what happened to you man but that isn't the reason why. You've got your pie chart all wrong. If you do not have a girlfriend, I'm pretty sure it's NOT because you're nice. It could be anything else (ahem PERSONALITY) but definitely not this. Never have I ever heard a girl telling me "I didn't like him because he was nice". Ever.
Just to be fair, I guess it is frustrating for some guys who are just unlucky, who treats girls nicely all the time but in turn always ended up disappointed and hurt. Well, I can't really say I understand, but to these guys so never wavered and never complained about being friendzoned because he was "too nice", I really really commend you. There is no such thing as being too nice. One day you're bound to be with someone who truly appreciates how you treat her and you deserve that.
And yeah, I understand that there are girls who take advantage of guys being nice to them, who know well fully how these guys feel about them and yet they still choose to lead guys on. But that is a rant for another day LOLOL. Ya I very chiong hei, dunno meh.
Also please read this. Extremely relevant:
Note: not talking about ALL GUYS in general but only SOME (ahem *the thousands of ppl on 9gag who shared and liked that pic*) and luckily none of my guy friends are like this.. But I DO know of guys who are like this though. How did you think I came across this 9gag pic if they didn't share it? :p
Ok and I swear last rant post. I think.
No matter how nice you treat a girl to win her heart, you are also forgetting that girls have a choice as human beings. Just because you're nice to girl, doesn't mean she has to choose you. She has every right to make choices and even if that choice doesn't involve being with you or even if it's a worse-off choice, it is her choice and it does not mean that she's wrong or she's a bitch. It may be unfortunate for you, yes, but it is not her fault.
Also.. Is the "friendzone" really such a bad place to be at? Can't two different genders just be friends without any need for sexual attraction or whatever it is? Why must some guys prioritize getting a girl than just being friends first?
Whatever it is, when I saw that pic on 9gag I instantly imagine a guy sitting behind his computer, carefully plotting his intricately drawn pie chart of "why I'm single" because all his Nice Guy attempts have not resulted in a GIRLFRIEND. SOUND SO BITTER AND SAD CAN. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS NOT BEING ABLE TO HAVE A GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE YOU'RE NICE. What fucking sad logic is that? How on earth did you manage to come up with that conclusion? I dunno what happened to you man but that isn't the reason why. You've got your pie chart all wrong. If you do not have a girlfriend, I'm pretty sure it's NOT because you're nice. It could be anything else (ahem PERSONALITY) but definitely not this. Never have I ever heard a girl telling me "I didn't like him because he was nice". Ever.
Just to be fair, I guess it is frustrating for some guys who are just unlucky, who treats girls nicely all the time but in turn always ended up disappointed and hurt. Well, I can't really say I understand, but to these guys so never wavered and never complained about being friendzoned because he was "too nice", I really really commend you. There is no such thing as being too nice. One day you're bound to be with someone who truly appreciates how you treat her and you deserve that.
And yeah, I understand that there are girls who take advantage of guys being nice to them, who know well fully how these guys feel about them and yet they still choose to lead guys on. But that is a rant for another day LOLOL. Ya I very chiong hei, dunno meh.
Also please read this. Extremely relevant:
(By Alisse Desrosiers, Feminspire)
Note: not talking about ALL GUYS in general but only SOME (ahem *the thousands of ppl on 9gag who shared and liked that pic*) and luckily none of my guy friends are like this.. But I DO know of guys who are like this though. How did you think I came across this 9gag pic if they didn't share it? :p
Ok and I swear last rant post. I think.
You are reading too much into this........people that website you quoted are are expanding and adding on to the meaning (BTW - you should post this on that 9gag website).
ReplyDeleteFriendzone is a real thing but it is 100% the "victim's" fault because almost always they do not make it known that they are interested, attracted to the female. That is their fault. It took me many years to learn that but now I have it.